Work/life balance is something that all the educational programs and business ventures I've ever engaged in dedicate at least some lip service to at some point. I know, I've been taught, how important it is to have some "balance" in my life; to find something I like to do and to spend time doing it outside of work. Trouble is, I seem to really like two things in life; work and school.
Tonight I realized it had been weeks (almost 4 weeks, actually) since I had done anything other than focus on those two items. Even during movie night at school I sat in the back of the auditorium with my laptop running working on our class project through the entire thing. So tonight, I gave my business partner, the guy who has dedicated a LOT of time and energy to the venture recently!, the night off and decided to treat myself as well by watching one of the movies I brought along. I have a dual screen setup on my computer that would actually allow for watching a movie on one screen while working on the other, but I thought this would be "cheating". So, I arranged my couch comfortably, opened all the shades so I could enjoy the city lights, turned out the lights, turned up the sound, and JUST watched a movie. It was actually nice. As a matter of fact, I can honestly say that I enjoyed it. Well, until the end that is.
At the end of the movie, I scrambled a couple of eggs then sat back down to the computer to work, and you know what I felt? I felt guilty. I felt like a couple of hours of my life were lost to me, to my business, to my educational pursuits, just because I watched a movie. Dang. Unexpected consequences, I guess.
So now I'm faced with a real dilemma. I'm thinking this can go either of two ways for me here (so far away from psychological counselling of any kind :-) Either I can force the issue a bit, and make myself take some time off now and then, if only to see if I can train myself to believe I deserve a break, OR I can abandon the exercise entirely and just stick to those two things that I seem to love, work and school. Work/Life Balance? Hmmm...perhaps for me it's going to just be Work.
I think you should force yourself to have some down time ever once in a while. Think of it like you are giving your brain a break so that you will be more effective when you do your work and school so it isn't just pointless or a waste!
ReplyDeleteYou could be right. A brain break is a really nice way to think of it. Thanks!
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